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The View Will Go On WITHOUT Whoopi Goldberg

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After re-hashing her anti-Semitic remarks about the holocaust and race, producers at The View have finally called it quits on Whoopi Goldberg. Executive Producer Joe Barron told our source that Whoopi is far more trouble than she’s worth.

“Imagine paying this person $8 million per year and all she does is cause trouble. People are tired of it,” said Barron, “we have no choice but to take action if the show is to continue.”

While there’s no official announcement yet, the casting department is already hard at work trying to find a replacement. “We’re not going with another woke liberal,” said casting director Art Tubolls, “We’re thinking of dropping a conservative as the lead for a while instead of just having one along for the ride as a token.”

The show is considering Candace Cameron Bure for the spot, though the new revelations of her time as a porn star may affect her chances. Judge Jeannine Pirro is also in the running, but they want her to go through a Greta Van Sustern-style “feminization” before allowing her on screen.

Tomi Lahren and the pant-shitter girl are running up the rear, but neither is showing much interest. “It would be nice to get Ben Shapiro’s sister’s boobs to make an appearance,” said Tubolls, “but that’s the Hollywood Casting agent in me talking.”

Whoopi is out, which is what really matters. God bless America.

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